Health Network News

Remember when you were in your twenties and romance was foremost on your mind? We may have had a lot of work to do but Mother Nature made sure that we kept looking for or thinking about that special someone. Once we get old, it seems that we are expected by modern society to forget about romance and sex.

Adult children don’t want to think about their parents having sex so the kids in the movies and on Madison Avenue shy away from creating images of seniors as sexy or romantic figures. This inaccurate portrayal exists on two levels. The idea that people over 50 no longer have sex may seem ridiculous but is quite prevalent. Think about the television commercials that you see. The very idea of older men and women enjoying a passionate relationship seems to be the subject of late-night comedy sketches.

It’s quite obvious that the children of the sexual revolution would still continue to have an abiding interest in those pleasurable pursuits after all these years. Many seniors, who have opted for living in retirement communities around the world, find a new lease on life traveling with their contemporaries now that they are free of dependents. Quite often this new lease on life after the kids have left may seem like an abrupt change in personality by their adult children; in fact it may simply be an expression of returning to their individuality and resuming their interest in themselves.

Adult life before retirement is often packed with pressures of raising kids and getting them “ready for life”, along with work and social pressures. Many senior couples find it difficult to make the adjustment from being responsible parents with many social obligations to finally having time to focus on their romantic needs. So when a marriage matures into retirement years together, it’s common for senior citizens to rediscover why they fell in love in the first place and experience a new period of romance that is fun and thrilling for both.

Life can be far more innovative and interesting for seniors now than it was in their teens or as twenty-somethings. Getting or staying healthy together can be much more fun when you remove the added complexity of work and parenthood. You can get to know and appreciate each other all over again in an uninhibited and unconstrained way.

Senior citizens are free to pursue their romantic inclinations at a slow, careful leisurely pace or enjoy spontaneous amorous interludes in each other’s arms while on vacation. Nature may have a different purpose for seniors than creating babies, therefore the intense motivation for getting together may be different than it was when you are both younger. Taking time in your senior years to go on romantic adventures or just enjoy the companionship of others is important for a well-balanced mental outlook.

Filling the gap left by a loved one who has passed can be daunting for many; continuing to share life with others and convert grief into a commitment to give and receive love may not only fill that gap but bring about emotional transformation. The feelings of loss can leave some seniors emotionally distant far longer than the healing process has accounted for. It is important to remember that life is still worthwhile and there is still much to contribute to it.

Many people think about the phrase “second childhood” with condescension while others see it as a transformation for learning and appreciating the little things we have missed for many years. This confusion of expectations required of others may actually lead to a new sense of self and an appreciation of what you have to offer the world. It may actually be liberating to remove the emotional constraints often developed by young parents as a means of maintaining family cohesion; this may be the time to experience a bit of spontaneity and free will. This attitude may not be understood very well by your adult children or other relatives because it may seem untoward or uncharacteristic of you. Take the time to rediscover your sensuality and romantic side as seniors; this is a very important aspect of your personality that should not go unfulfilled.